How did I get here?

2003

2009

UGGHHH. It really takes alot for me to post these pictures. I’m actually cringing right now knowing that other people are going to look at them and see how bad it got. See that ‘after’ picture? That’s what happens when you eat nothing but fast food and don’t exercise. The worst part is that picture was 10 pounds less than what I was when I finally walked into Weight Watchers.

When I see that picture, I don’t feel inside that I look that overweight. In my mind, I am still the 19 year old girl who can be as active as she wants and wear anything when she goes to the store. The reality of it is I hated shopping (kinda still do), got tired at the thought of actually exercising and literally hid from old friends. All my old friends saw me when I looked my best and I couldn’t even fathom them seeing me 50, 60, 70 pounds overweight.

I saw on another blog the question: How did I get so big? I’ve asked myself that same question so many times. How could I do this to myself? How could I abuse my body and organs with terrible food and chemicals? Who wants to go through life hating shopping, never finding anything to wear that looks flattering, or feeling self-conscious because when you talk to someone you don’t think they are looking at you, but all of the fat you carry on your body? These are all things I have felt as a result of my lack of self-control when it comes to saying NO to fast food.

While I still struggle with choosing fast food over homemade dishes (I’m working on it!) the good news is Weight Watchers has helped me tremendously. Sure, I still have my ‘off’ days, but with new friends and supporters I am taking each day at a time to make the right decisions. In the year I have been on Weight Watchers, my confidence has grown, I wear clothes in the closet that still had tags on them when I couldn’t fit into my jeans and I am learning how to manage what I eat — not take half of the food groups out of my diet.

I know we all struggle with why we got to the weight we are at. It didn’t add up overnight. I’m just going to stick to this journey until I have a great new ‘after AFTER’ picture to show off!

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